I am always online looking for inspiration. I love being able to scroll through my feed and I LOVE seeing so many fab bloggers killing it at the moment. I always use instagram and pinterest and bloglovin to feed my inspiration and help me make my blog my own. But I feel like there is a very fine line between inspiration and comparing yourself.
And I think I have crossed that line.
When you start feeling a bit crappy about yourself or your blog or you feed, you turn to other for inspiration. But thats the dangerous thing. It’s not inspiration anymore.
You start looking at their feeds, their follower counts, their engagement and think to yourself ‘why am I not like that?’ ‘Why am I not as good as that?.. As pretty as that?.. As successful as that?’ You start putting yourself down and comparing yourself to the person who was supposed to spark a bit of inspiration. And that sucks.
I have been feeling a bit crappy about my instagram at the moment. I think its a mixture of the shadow ban and the lack of engagement… But it’s also because I am cross at myself for being so lazy at the moment. Over summer I was really good at going out and taking photos and writing up posts in advanced and planning content and now… It’s all kinda gone to sh*t.
During summer I had a full time job, I was balancing a long distance relationship and somehow was keeping up with everything. But now I just seem to have fallen into a bit of a whole. My lectures have barely started, I have minimal work to be doing, I have a fab new wardrobe and I have my personal photographer (the boyfriend) at hand.
And yet I haven’t grasped that.
I havent taken every opportunity I have to snap an outfit pic or write up a post or apply for a campaign.
I’ve gotten lazy and I hate myself for it.
And the worst part is that the only thing I can think of doing instead of fixing it, is looking to other for ‘inspiration’, but spending the whole time just comparing myself to them and using them as an excuse to feel sorry for myself.
So now it is time to stop. Now it is time to use inspiration for inspiring purposes and to stop putting myself down for not doing well enough. I need to stop being lazy. I need to jump on every picture opportunity and collaboration and content idea and run with it. I need to go at my blog with the same amount of passion as when I first started. And I need to stop comparing myself to others, because even in this rutt, I am still doing pretty great.